“Home is the nicest word there is.” This is my favorite quote from Laura Ingalls Wilder. But, at times, I wonder if other people feel the same way I do about home.
Home Is More Than Decorations and Clean Floors
I’ve always been a stay-at-home wife, mom, & plus for 18 years a homeschooling parent. I’m often at home. I stopped driving a long time ago. My chronic illnesses also tend to keep me at home. But I’m happy at home. I enjoy being around my family & our pets, & as far as I know, they enjoy me too.
I’ve worked hard to create a home environment that is comfortable. I’m not good at decorating, most of our house has white walls, cluttered rooms & has a good lived-in look. When I visit my friends’ homes, their homes feel so cozy, look clean & often decorated nicely with country charm. I used to feel that since my home didn’t look like a photo out of a magazine, then I wasn’t a good homemaker. I am not a natural homemaker at all, & clean to me at times can be as long as you see the floor, we are ok. I once joked to my husband, “Cleaning with kids in the home is like shoveling snow during a blizzard.” He didn’t miss a beat & replied: “But, sometimes you have to get the car out of the driveway.” I didn’t think it was very funny at the time.
Over the past 32 years of being a stay-at-home wife & mom, I’ve learned that a home is not the way your home looks; it helps to have a nice-looking home, but that is not the point when creating a home.
We represent our home
So what is the point? I think it has to do with the feeling inside the home, the family that lives there & the way people feel when they visit. Is your husband happy to come home after a long day of work? Do your kids happily rush into the house, glad to be back home after a vacation? Do your friends feel welcomed?
Back when I originally wrote this as an article for a magazine, my at the time, 13yr old son asked me what I was writing about & after I told him, I think he summed it up very well. He said, “We represent our home.”
He is correct & it took me a long time to learn this. I’ve noticed some of my kids’ friends seem to enjoy our home. At one point, when my oldest was 18 & her best friend, who was also 18, house/pet sat for us when we went on vacation. My daughter’s friend told me how much she enjoyed her time here & has asked us when we are going to go on vacation again. That made me feel that just maybe I’m doing something right when it comes to making a home.
Why I Enjoy Being at Home
I’ve had people say to me, “How can you stand being at home all the time?” As I said, I don’t drive due to my health. The moment my oldest learned to drive, someone said to me, “Well, at least now you can get out of the house.” My first thought was, “Get out to do what?” I have three children & a home to care for, plus I’m homeschooling them. I don’t have time to just get out of the house, & even if I did, what would I do? Waste gas to go to the mall & look at things I can’t afford to buy? Of course, I didn’t say that out loud.
The Signs You’ve Created a Happy Home
I think what finally convinced me that I’ve made a good home was when my 18-year-old got her first house-sitting job. She told me she was going to come over to visit the following morning. She couldn’t stand to be away from us too long. She had been gone 12 hours at the most. I smiled, knowing she was eager to come back home.
I enjoy being at home & so does my family. I don’t want to get out or away from my home. A home should not be a place that you want to escape (yet sometimes homeschooling moms need to escape from their children), a home should be a place of joy & relaxation. I think that is the key to having & making a good home. Our garage may look like a home out of hoarders, dishes may pile up, counters are full & laundry is calling my name, begging me to fold it, but we are happy at home.
So, for eighteen years, our home wasn’t just where we lived—it was where we learned. As a homeschooling family, our house became a classroom, gathering place, and safe haven all rolled into one.
A happy home isn’t measured by spotless counters, perfect decorating, or tv home makeover-worthy rooms. It’s measured by the people who live there and how they feel when they walk through the door. If your family feels loved, welcomed, and happy to come home, you’re doing more right than you may realize.
